Be part of a community

A Year of Turned-On Living

Turned-On Living is my an intimate yearlong small group coaching adventure for a group of 8 women. Made for smart, quirky women 40+, TOL is designed to help you get clear about what you want for your life through embodiment, and then to live it with the support of other women. The next cohort starts in September 2024. Wanna join us?

Are you ready to get out of isolation and join me in A Year of Turned-On Living? 

Through AYOTL, I bring together eight open-minded, adventurous women who want to step out of the blahness that we are expected to live as women at midlife and into lives of our own creation and choosing.  We create a community to uplift each other.

Every month has a theme to help you step into empowerment in your everyday life. You’ll learn new skills, from how to create a vision for your life to how to use pussybreathing to power your clarity, life force energy, and confidence.

We spend a year together meeting 3x a month to build strong bonds. We learn and grow together, then meet in-person for a retreat. Turned-On Living is an investment in you, something that will serve and fuel you for the rest of your life.

More in control

“As a result of doing the Turned-On Living year, I feel like the true controller of my actions, instead of feeling like a victim of everything and everyone around me. Turned-On Living was a great experience. I can’t even express how great. I tried to, but honestly, I don’t think words can do it justice.”

Jill, Hoboken, TOL 23

What you get out of it

A more empowered, turned-on you  

  • Get clear about what an authentically turned-on life looks like for you at this current phase of your life; learn about yourself and through bonds formed in the group
  • Incorporate more joy, lightheartedness and play into life
  • Practice being vulnerable and real within a safe space 
  • Discover what empowerment through embodiment feels like for you
  • Learn anti-people-pleasing skills to stop being “too nice” and become more assertive
  • Develop a softer, kinder, more compassionate relationship with yourself  
  • Reconnect to your sexuality and sensuality, and discover what doing that can give you in all areas of your life
  • Be a part of a community of like-minded women giving and receiving support
  • Learn tools that you will be able to use for a lifetime 

Uncover who you are now

 “I highly recommend A Year of Turned-on Living if you’re in need of a wriggle out of the darkness and someone to provide the necessary encouragement and options to find your version of a turned-on life. Sasha hears what we need, she has the ability to uncover what’s underneath and guide us to discovery. I couldn’t imagine someone else for this journey.”–

Maggie, Austin, TOL 23 

Meet Your Coach!

I’m Sasha

I’m the author of the cult favorite Quirkyalone (HarperCollins) and To-Do List (Simon & Schuster). I’m also a former Silicon Valley entrepreneur, a world-traveling tango dancer and spiritual seeker who has been working as a life and leadership coach since 2012. I help women 40+ get clear about what they want and go for it.

Through my own life, I have discovered what a deep connection with my body and my sexual energy (independent of a romantic relationship) can do for my own vitality, joy, energy, and courage.

I designed Turned-On Living as a small group program because . breakthroughs come when people witness and support each other in a safe space. When you learn how to let your guard down and open up in this community, you’ll be prepared for other spaces.

My upcoming memoir The Higher Purpose of Pleasure tells the story of how I healed the emotional impact of a secret of childhood sexual abuse through adventures in sensuality in South America.

I bring a trauma-aware approach to Turned-On Living. I genuinely love helping women connect to and turn on the power they have inside of them.

What we cover

Month by Month

September: Intentions… and Pussywalking!

Getting to know each other and our intentions, beginning to define what turned-on living looks for each of us.

We’ll also learn how to set intentions for the year from Sasha’s story, research, and each other, and dedicate a session to getting going with pussywalking as a fundamental tool for building confidence. We begin to develop our “pussy energy” which is anything but weak.

October: Embodied Self-Compassion

You will learn simple mind-body daily practices to help you become kinder and gentler to yourself, and we practice together, learning from each other. 

Self-compassion is a fundamental tool to help reduce the impact of your inner critic, which would otherwise limit our experiments in Turned-On Living!

We also start a first draft of the vows you will be making to yourself later in the year, in a soul commitment ceremony at our in-person retreat. Turned-On Living is a yearlong program. Practices will pave the way for changes that happen throughout the year. 

November: Deep Routines of Self-Care

Building habits of deep self-care that support you to feel grounded, regulated, and connected with yourself and your life force energy. We need routines to keep us connected to our inner light, and we need them even more when times are tough!

I teach you the tools that I know that work best from research and coaching to create morning routines (or other times of day, depending on what works best for you). You create your own “habit-stack,” then experiment in the context of our supportive group. 

We’ll also look at using digital devices mindfully to stay grounded and intentionally minimize draining tendencies of doom-scrolling and zoning out. 

December: Play, Fun and Adventure 

There’s this whole conspiracy in life to make adulthood not fun. When you are having more fun, you are more confident. When you are feeling more pleasure, you naturally become bold. When you are more clear about what you want, you have the capacity to make it happen.

December is often rife with obligations. We will minimize obligation and focus on living from desire, joy, and play. I guide you in pussybreathing, and pussywhispering.

January: Visioning

It’s so important to be clear about what we really want–we get lost when we don’t know and we’re not able to say it out loud.

You will write a vision and read it out loud in our group. You learn how to connect with your body to discern your vision.  

When there is desire, there is also fear. I teach you strategies to deal with fear and build courage.

February: Anti-People-Pleasing Month

Becoming more assertive will be a theme of Turned-On Living. The truth is a turn-on. People-pleasing drains our turn-on.

We will be workshopping specific situations in everyone’s lives and learning new ways to speak up for yourself without breaking connection. We’ll practice saying yes and NO. 

We will also use physical empowerment exercises to embody standing up for our own needs. 

March: Prioritizing Pleasure 

As women, we are socialized to put others’ needs, and joy, above our own. Or to think it’s selfish to pursue what’s good for us. What is pleasurable for you?

We’ll be looking into pleasure in unique and new ways to feel good and turned-on in daily life. Even dull tasks can be turned into pleasurable experiences. You’ll learn about the science of pleasure and how it fuels growth and confidence. 

April: Embodiment

Embodiment can be totally life-changing and so subtle and fascinating. True change gets anchored in your body. You are going to learn a new way of relating to your body from the inside out. 

We’ll  gaze at our bodies in the mirror to discover what we enjoy and share with the group. We connect the dots on embodiment and people-pleasing, to discover how signals from the body may signal it’s time to be honest and speak up. 

We also dive into how connecting with our body can help us make embodied decisions. 

May: Asking for What You Want

What do you want? What do you really, really want? 

We practice asking for what we really want in a way that will transform your ability to make bold requests. 

We will also practice getting into your BAD girl and what she really wants. 

June: Self-Marriage + Our Retreat

A Year of Turned-On Living is a commitment to yourself; we seal the deal with unique co-created “soul commitment” ceremonies that we do as part of our retreat in June at a beautiful farm just outside Providence. Everyone gets witnessed reading their vows. 

That cliche that you have to love yourself before you can love others…that’s actually true. What do you want in a relationship with a partner? How can you give more of that to yourself? 

July: Sensuality 

What is sensual for you? What is erotic? What does it look like to deepen your connection to your sensuality? How does a woman develop and express her sexuality in a healthy, life-affirming way, with a partner and/or without?

I will teach you tools to connect with your own sexuality and sexual energy, to build your energy for self-pleasure and the subtle pleasure energy that can power your days. 

We explore the connections between sexual energy and life force energy, and how to cultivate it.

August: Boldness

Finally, we turn to boldness, looking for opportunities to be bold in daily life and in our lives.

We return to the question of how to “dance with fear,” because fear always comes up when we want to do new things. These experiments in boldness during the final month will send you into summer 2025, and the rest of your life.

Overcoming people-pleasing

 I learned that what I considered being ‘nice’ was sometimes people-pleasing behavior.  After our group coaching, if I’m struggling with a decision, I have used the pussybreathing practice to determine if my body is a yes or a no to something.

Learning the skills of anti-people-pleasing had a lot to do with making a sabbatical happen this year. Previously, I would have thought, Oh, it’s a big inconvenience for people at work for me to be out three months. Now I’m like, It’s OK. They’ll deal with it.”

Davina, Toronto, TOL 23

What we DO together

FAQ

How does it work?

Three group calls per month (each one about one hour). 

One guided LIVE 30-minute pussywalking session a month for wholeness, confidence and embodied sensuality that gets you walking differently as a habit.

Monthly Check-In Buddies: Every month you get a new person to connect with. These relationships help to foster closer connections as well as accountability and support.

Quarterly personal check-ins with me. I take the time to connect with each person quarterly so we can talk about any blocks or support you need. 

In-person retreat in Rhode Island in the last quarter of our year together.

What is pussywalking?

Pussywalking is a mindfulness practice that I invented back in 2012 to help women (and men) find confidence through their bodies, specifically through the process of awakening sexual energy in the pelvic region and then circulating it throughout their bodies as they walk. I’ve been teaching it every since and you’ll get to deeply integrate your unique pussywalk through our year together. Watch this video for a sneak preview!

Is pussywalking still relevant to me as a post-menopausal woman?

Absolutely! Pussywalking might even be more relevant for women who are on pause with their sexuality or sexual energy or going through new phases in life and finding themselves again. 

What if I have to miss a session?

Everyone is going to miss calls sometimes due to conflicts and life. In that case, you listen to the recording and catch up with the group on the week’s “playwork” on our private online group.

How big is the group?

The group will be 8-10 women max. I keep things small enough to create a feeling of intimacy with everyone getting seen and heard.

What if I don’t fit in with the other members, and/or they don’t like me?

I curate the group carefully to create a group with good chemistry. I am your matchmaker. I have many years of experience of bringing people together. Many people have found friends through my workshops — it’s quite possible you will meet people that you bond with deeply.