Bringing embodiment and self-love to the masses on the Dr. Phil show on self-marriage (!)

by | Feb 18, 2023 | Interviews, Podcasts, Quirkyalone, Relationships, Self-marriage, The Point of Life is to Enjoy, Turned-On Living | 6 comments

Being on the Dr. Phil show on self-marriage was a wild ride, to say the least

I said, “When I listen to you, I feel tense in my body,” to the conservative man they brought on to be my foil, I fell back on all my somatic coaching training because I was truly at a loss for what to say with all the nonsense coming out of his mouth about people marrying animals!

Sonya and Danni, the two other women who appeared on the show to share their stories are truly spectacular.

Together we helped to show that what at first seems like a weird idea really is not.

Be sure to sign up for my newsletter for the juicy stories that are yet to come about how this came to be.

If you are interested in marrying yourself with guidance and support, you can  join the next cohort of my group coaching program Turned-On Living, where you get to enter into the process with the support of other women on the self-love journey.

And… let me know what you thought about the show!

Would love to hear any and all reactions! With a caveat: no hate tolerated. Any nasty comments on this blog post will be deleted.

PS  August 16, 2023: The YouTube account that hosted the full episode got deleted. I’ll look for another recording. To get the full story, read this account published in November 7, 2023, “The True Story of My (Ill-Advised?) Decision to Appear on the Dr. Phil Show.”


With Sonya and Danni, the other two (fabulous) women guests who married themselves, on the Dr. Phil show. Thanks to assistant producer Kalley for the photo. I helped Kalley and her sister Camryn get engaged to themselves after the show!


  1. Robbie

    I loved watching the Dr Phil Show on Self Marriage. Sasha Cagen you were AWESOME! You explained self-marriage so succinctly and really drew attention to the Marriage Project guy’s so called “statistics” on the apparent greater happiness of married people. Really?
    I loved how Danni made it very clear that self-marriage is about self love and has nothing to do with romantic love, and those who are self married are not against traditional marriage. The two young women who got engaged to themselves were wonderful too and so eloquent the way they both spoke about what marrying themselves would mean to them. Once they put the rings on their fingers you could see and feel their joy.
    As a fellow sologamist I hope this show helps to bring the concept of self-marriage to many thousands, perhaps millions more people This would be amazing.
    Thank you Sasha for being a wonderful advocate for self marriage and women’s empowerment in general. I’m an Australian fan!

    • Sasha Cagen

      Thanks so much Robbie! For some reason this comment didn’t come to me as an email so I just got to approve it now. Really appreciate your responses here and all you are doing to bring the message of self-marriage to folks in Australia. Surely we will meet one of these days 🙂

  2. Siss

    You rock!

  3. Jill E Summerville

    I watched this episode twice. The first time, the self-marriage ceremonies made me cry so hard I couldn’t focus on what anyone was saying. Thank you Sasha, Dani, Sonya, Kalley, and Camryn for sharing your strength and your insights. You make me proud to be a member of the self-married (sologamish?) community.
    Sasha, I’m especially glad you articulated embodiment and shared your physical response to Johnny McEntee. I think it’s important for women to see how healthy embodiment practices can help us encounter patriarchical discourse.

    • Sasha Cagen

      Thanks so much Jill! I love what you posted on FB too! If you want, I would love that you share that here too as a comment. You have a way with words on this topic!

  4. Leena Sarkar

    Hi Sasha,
    Congratulations on doing an amazing job on the Dr. Phil Show. I just watched it.
    It is truly weird and sooo Handmaid Tale ish that the conservatives are so obsessed with the birth rate in the U.S. and that they link this fear to their arguments against self marriage.
    First, their concept of marriage is so heterosexist and also completely invalidating for people who don’ t or can’ t have children. Also invalidating of the fact that we have 9 billion humans to take care of in this world. We are hardly lacking human life! Also ignores the fact that you don’ t need to get married to have children and many people do…their arguments seem firmly lodged in the 1950’s America.
    And as to the sociologist’s data, of course married people are more prosperous…since all the institutions and programs give them significant financial advantages! You were right to bring up the need for policies to support single people aging well and being loved and also to mention Bella De Paulo’ s work and research on happiness.
    Also, very ridiculous to have a Trump supporter talk about the need for more selflessness and caring for others… I just don’ t get how a person can become so deluded. It is truly frightening. He made me tense, too!
    I found Dr. Phil’ s questions to be quite superficial, but that is par for the course. I thought you handled him graciously.
    He focused on the weddings rather than the core of the matter, which is the committment to loving oneself.
    Of course more women want gorgeous, elaborate weddings. They are trained from childhood to want that fairy tale day. Maybe if we all got that kind of wonderful day, regardless of our relationship status, we would be less inclined to try to grab a partner to make it happen! So many thoughts!
    Anyway, I just wanted to say I thought you did an excellent job of bringing forth the message of self love and ceremony.
    Hope you are well and that you fully enjoyed that experience. I am sure you will have a lot of new fans as a result, which is great.
    All the best.


Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Hi! I’m Sasha

Executive and Life Coach on a mission to help women connect with their bodies to pursue their truest desires in the bedroom and the world.

Author of Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics (HarperCollins) + To-Do List: From Buying Milk to Finding a Soul Mate, What Our Lists Reveal About Us (Simon & Schuster).

At work on a memoir called Wet, about adventures in healing through sensuality.

Be sure to subscribe to my newsletter (my primary way of staying in connection with readers and clients).

Follow me on Instagram where I share snapshots of my own turned-on life with advice on how to live your own.