Just in case you were wondering, here’s a guide to what I’m talking about!

Sasha Glossary

Here is a recent happy email exchange. Sort of funny to share something like this on my website, but what the hell? Moments like this make me smile.
 
Hi Sasha,
Further to our messages on Instagram, I am emailing to set up an interview with you for my new podcast. I really appreciate you agreeing to speak with me.
I would be particularly interested in talking about your background and single life, your book, Quirkyalone, and it would be great to touch on the topic of sex and pussywalking (which I now practice, myself) if you’re happy to do so!
 
Sounds great. Happy to talk about all of those topics, they are in complete alignment with what I am up to with Turned-On Living and Wet. Pussywalking is a consistent practice in Turned-On Living (a key to Turned-On Living?) and Quirkyalone of course is perennial.
Talk soon!
Sasha
 
As I read this exchange, I notice that most people will not understand what is going on here because there are so many words that would be unfamiliar. Pussywalking? Turned-on living? Quirkyalone? Wet? I mean, most people know what “wet” means but the usage seems different here.
 
I put this glossary on my website to make sure you know what I am talking about. Wittgenstein put it best: “The limits of my language means the limits of my world.”
 
In addition to being a writer, a life coach, and a tango-obsessed world-traveler, I am a language geek, and a word inventor. I create language that creates pockets of other worlds. Some people want to enter that world with me. These are my folks! If that’s you, then welcome!
 

 Sasha Glossary

Quirkyalone

Coined by Sasha in 2000

Quirkyalone is a word that I first invented in a 700-word essay that I labored on for over a year obsessively, and then published in T0-Do List, a magazine of meaningful minutiae that I published for several years. Utne Reader reprinted the essay in September 2000.

Thousands of people responded to that short essay, and the rest is herstory. There has since been a book, Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics, published by HarperOne in 2004, a holiday, a movement, and the basis for many courses, retreats, and coaching programs I have led.

The formal definition of “quirkyalone?” A person who enjoys being single (or solitude) and so prefers to wait for the right person to come along rather than dating indiscriminately or for the sake of being in a couple. There are also quirkytogethers (quirkyalones in relationships) and quirkysluts.

Some have asked me if in creating quirkyalone I was the mother of “solo poly.” Quirkyalone people can certainly choose to engage in poly relationships or identify as solo poly, but wanting multiple relationships isn’t a defining characteristic of being quirkyalone. The defining characteristics are not wanting to settle and valuing self-love. 

I am especially proud that this word of mine has made it into dictionary.com (and a number of other dictionary websites) where there is a whole section on the origins of the word. A girl like me doesn’t grow up anticipating putting a word in the dictionary!

Turned-On Living

Crystallized in 2022

Turned-On Living is a philosophy and set of tools that was born out of my fifteen years of exploring the relationship between sensuality, body connection, sexual energy, and women’s empowerment.

It’s my signature coaching program teaching you a philosophy and approach to getting clear about what you want and going for it by connecting with your body and your life force energy with tools you can use for a lifetime.

Every person’s definition of a turned-on life will be individual to her, but rest assured, it’s the opposite of zoning out to Instagram. To be turned-on is to be plugged into your desires for life, lit up (and maybe even lightening up) inside, and finding the courage to take the risks required to live a turned-on life outside the comfort zone.  

Turned-On Living also tends to involve a fair amount of anti-people-pleasing, as much of our turned-on for life gets drained when we are doing things we don’t really want to do because of our fears about how we will be perceived or whether we will be liked. Turned-On Living is fundamentally about honesty–with yourself and others. 

 

Pussywalking

Created by Sasha in 2012

Pussywalking is a methodology of physical empowerment that I created to help women step into their power by connecting with their bodies, specifically, the power between their legs. The word is provocative; the provocative nature of the word is key to the naming. While it is shocking for many women to use the word “pussy,” it’s also delightfully shocking to tap into this part of the body outside of sex.

Pussywalking is a mindfulness practice that helps women to increase their confidence and improve their posture and energy by awakening sexual energy in the pelvic region and then circulating it throughout the body as they walk.

The effects of pussywalking are numerous, from your gait to your posture to your mental and emotional state. You can learn more about pussywalking, and how to do it, here.

I developed pussywalking through my deep study of tango, female sexuality, and women’s empowerment. The best way to master and integrate your pussywalk is to join my small, intimate, curated group coaching program Turned-On Living, because we practice pussywalking all year long together. 

WET

Conceived of as the title for my next book, a memoir  

Wet is the title of my next book, a memoir that I have been working on for more than ten years!

The title of this book suggests that I like to go for a swim now and again, and while I do love immersing myself in water, my intention is to suggest something bigger.

In WET, I share a story of healing from buried memories of childhood sexual abuse through sensual adventures that will take readers along a wild ride of self-discovery. Think Eat Pray Love meets The Body Keeps the Score

First I thought of “wet” as the opposite of “dry,” and I was definitely escaping a dry existence in Silicon Valley when I ran away to South America. Wet came to mean much more: connecting with one’s body, reading its cues for desires and distastes (the opposite of desires).  To get wet is to dive in, sweat and all.  

For women, to get wet sounds like a sexual invitation, but I don’t mean a narrow definition of wet related to sexual arousal. To get wet is to enter into the water, like the amniocentesis where we were born. When we get wet, we value getting loose and fluid. We listen to our bodies, and the intuitions that we feel through them. When we get wet, we dive into life.

I am currently seeking early readers of the manuscript. You can learn more and sign up to be an early reader here.

Tangasm

Used by Sasha in a 2014 essay, “Is Tango Better than Sex?”

I did not coin the word tangasm or tangasmo, though some Buenos Aires tango websites have said I did. I write about the tangasm in Wet, and in this essay, “Is Tango Better than Sex?”

A tangasm is something that tango dancers experience as a moment of transcendent, blissful connection with oneself, a tango dance partner, the music, and the whole room. You can read about the tangasm in this essay, Is Tango Better than Sex?

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