Hi! I’m Sasha Cagen. Born and raised in suburban Rhode Island, I spent much of my adult life in the Bay Area, California, until I decided to say [email protected]#$#@ it to societal expectations and moved to Argentina to reconnect with myself and my work. 

I’m an author, an entrepreneur, and a life coach for women (and a few sensitive, self-aware men) who want to stay true to themselves, never settle, and live outside the box according to their true desires for life.

Since 2000, I’ve been a leading voice for women (and men) validating the choice to be single while being open to a healthy, loving relationship in the media and within my quirkyalone community. Quirkyalone isn’t about being alone. It’s about knowing your worth, single or coupled, and not setting for less than what you really want for your life.

My career has been a series of creative projects. My biggest projects have been Quirkyalone (Harper San Francisco) and To-Do List (Simon & Schuster), To-Do List magazine (winner of the award of best new magazine in Utne‘s Alternative Press Awards), my online courses for quirkyalones, the Tango Adventure, and Solo Chica: a brand to inspire solo female transformative travel.

At the moment I am working on a memoir: Wet. That’s been the biggest creative project of my life thus far!

My work as a coach, writer, and movement-builder has been featured in dozens of media outlets, including CNN, NPR, BBC, The New York Times, USA Today, and The Wall Street Journal.

My books

My cult hit book Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics (2004) launched a movement. An inherently feminist concept that supports both women and men, but especially women who are so often seen as lesser if they are single, Quirkyalone is for for people who cherish their solitude, want to find a mate, but who would rather be alone than settle for just anyone. 

Quirkyalone is a book of essays, art, and interviews written to comfort and encourage people who prefer to be single rather than settle. I wrote the book after my original essay defining this new word was published in my own magazine To-Do List, then reprinted in Utne Reader. That essay triggered a massive emotional reaction in many people who identified and led to the demand for the book. I wrote the book based on my own experience of feeling like something might be wrong with me because I had been single much of my life while I also longed for a romantic relationship. I subsequently interviewed many who identify as quirkyalone, quirkytogether, and of course, quirkysluts!

I have subsequently connected with thousands of readers and people who identify as quirkyalone or quirkytogether and have supported many women and men in in-person and online workshops, coaching, and travel adventures. 

Quirkyalone is a perennial favorite available in English on Amazon, in many libraries, and on order wherever books are sold.

For non-English-speaking readers, there are also Brazilian, German, and Danish editions of Quirkyalone. It’s always fun to translate “quirky” and “quirkyalone” in another language.


My second book To-Do List: From Buying Milk to Finding a Soul Mate, What Our Lists Reveal About Us provides a window into our souls via our to-do lists and the stories behind them. This book grew out of To-Do List magazine. It’s a book any glazomaniac (obsessive list lover) should own. In the video above you can see me share my research on the habits of list-makers in an [email protected] talk. 

I’m currently focused on completing a memoir called Wet. Yes, you heard the title right. Wet is my story of healing the effects of early sexual trauma through sensuality, finding the courage to face the past, and learning to love myself enough to open myself up for the intimacy that I always wanted. Wet is also all about following signals from the body. How many times can I write the word “Wet“!
Sign up to be a beta reader and listen to a podcast about Wet here.


Coach with me

I offer:
life coaching for individuals
life and business coaching for entrepreneurs. This allows us to talk about strategy, business issues, sex/dating, love/relationship, self-love, and all personal matters. About it all!


Just for fun, some factoids…

Origin of name: My formal name is Alexandra Cagen, but most people–or everyone, really–calls me Sasha. Sasha is a Russian nickname for Alexandra. I was named for my Ukrainian great-grandmother.

Education: Cranston High School East, then Amherst College (where I was quite unhappy), then Barnard College (where I was happier), then the school of life in San Francisco, CTI coach training and tango and psicotango in Buenos Aires plus many other writing and personal development workshops. Learning is constant!

Where I discovered tango: Cali, Colombia, the world capital of salsa!

Famous for: inventing “quirkyalone,” inventing “pussywalking,” being the first woman in Argentina to marry herself (seriously, google it), talking about tangasms 

Favorite things: Wandering Paris in August, then drinking Rose by the Seine at a milonga. Swimming in the ocean first thing in the morning. The way my body feels after stretching my hips. Finishing a piece of writing finally. New insights. Great conversation. A really good laugh. Friends. Creativity and collaboration. Sex. Love. Passionfruit in anything.

Sign up for the newsletter! 

Join the 5,000+ who are on the newsletter the Sasha Cagen Weeklyish, emphasis on -ish, to be connected for all in my quirky HQ: new books, blog posts, parties, brunches, travel, inspiring quirkyalone women and men, and more opportunities for fun, growth, and adventure.