Hi! I’m Sasha
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Hi! I’m Sasha Cagen.
I’m an author, an entrepreneur, and a life coach for women (and a few sensitive, self-aware men) who want to stay true to themselves, never settle, and live outside the box according to their true desires for life. My books are Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics (Harper San Francisco) and To-Do List: From Buying Milk to Finding a Soulmate, What Our Lists Reveal About Us (Simon & Schuster).
Since 2000, I’ve been a leading voice for women (and men) validating the choice to be single while being open to a healthy, loving relationship in the media and within my quirkyalone community. Quirkyalone isn’t about being alone. It’s about knowing your worth, single or coupled, and not setting for less than what you really want for your life.
My career has been a series of creative projects. In addition to writing books, I published To-Do List magazine (winner of the award of best new magazine in Utne‘s Alternative Press Awards). I also cofounded StyleMob, a street fashion social network my co-founder and I sold to a larger company after 9 months. I’m also responsible for my online courses for quirkyalones, the Tango Adventure, and Solo Chica: a brand to inspire solo female transformative travel.
At the moment I am working on a memoir: Wet. That’s been the biggest creative project of my life thus far!
My work as a coach, writer, and movement-builder has been featured in dozens of media outlets, including CNN, NPR, BBC, The New York Times, USA Today, and The Wall Street Journal.
For me, to write, to grow and to support others in their own growth is the best way to live.
My cult hit book Quirkyalone: A Manifesto for Uncompromising Romantics (2004) launched a movement. An inherently feminist concept that supports both women and men, but especially women who are so often seen as lesser if they are single, Quirkyalone is for for people who cherish their solitude, want to find a mate, but who would rather be alone than settle for just anyone.
Quirkyalone is a book of essays, art, and interviews written to comfort and encourage people who prefer to be single rather than settle. I wrote the book after my original essay defining this new word was published in my own magazine To-Do List, then reprinted in Utne Reader. That essay triggered a massive emotional reaction in many people who identified and led to the demand for the book. I wrote the book based on my own experience of feeling like something might be wrong with me because I had been single much of my life while I also longed for a romantic relationship. I subsequently interviewed many who identify as quirkyalone, quirkytogether, and of course, quirkysluts!
I have subsequently connected with thousands of readers and people who identify as quirkyalone or quirkytogether and have supported many women and men in in-person and online workshops, coaching, and travel adventures.
Quirkyalone is a perennial favorite available in English on Amazon, in many libraries, and on order wherever books are sold.
For non-English-speaking readers, there are also Brazilian, German, and Danish editions of Quirkyalone. It’s always fun to translate “quirky” and “quirkyalone” in another language.
My second book To-Do List: From Buying Milk to Finding a Soul Mate, What Our Lists Reveal About Us provides a window into our souls via our to-do lists and the stories behind them. This book grew out of To-Do List magazine. It’s a book any glazomaniac (obsessive list lover) should own. In the video above you can see me share my research on the habits of list-makers in an [email protected] talk.
I’m currently focused on completing a memoir called Wet. Yes, you heard the title right. Wet is my story of healing the effects of early sexual trauma through sensuality, finding the courage to face the past, and learning to love myself enough to open myself up for the intimacy that I always wanted. Wet is also all about following signals from the body. How many times can I write the word “Wet“!
Sign up to be a beta reader and listen to a podcast about Wet here.
Coach with me
Just for fun, some factoids…
Origin of name: My formal name is Alexandra Cagen, but most people–or everyone, really–calls me Sasha. Sasha is a Russian nickname for Alexandra. I was named for my Ukrainian great-grandmother.
Roots: Born and raised in Rhode Island, the biggest little state in the union, in Creaaaaanston, a town famous for its high hair and its Camaros (when I was in high school anyway). I’ve since lived in Western Massachusetts; Somerville, MA; New York City; San Francisco; Oakland; Buenos Aires; and a bit of time in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil and Cali, Colombia. I like to get around. My favorite places are dancing cities like Rio, Havana, and Cali, and usually those cities have a combination of African and Latin influence.
Education: Cranston High School East, then Amherst College (where I was quite unhappy), then Barnard College (where I was happier), then the school of life in San Francisco, CTI coach training and tango and psicotango in Buenos Aires plus many other writing and personal development workshops. Learning is constant!
Where I discovered tango: Cali, Colombia, the world capital of salsa!
Famous for: inventing “quirkyalone” and “pussywalking.” Plus, I was the first woman in Argentina to marry herself (seriously).
Favorite things: Wandering Paris. Swimming in the ocean first thing in the morning. The way my body feels after stretching my hips. Finishing a piece of writing finally. New insights. Great conversation. A really good laugh. Friends. Creativity and collaboration. Sex. Love. Passionfruit in anything.
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